I am very recently married, just this weekend and as we are not going on a honeymoon for several months want to get my thank you’s out quickly.
I know everyone who got us a gift/gave us a card (with money or not) gets a thank you card. I am wondering about the rest of our guests (I didn’t expect gifts, our guests were very generous). Both my new husband and I made it a point to get up and circulate through the tables talking to everyone and thanking them for coming and again through the night as they left or when we did. Do we also send out a thank you note? I’m not sure if we would seem like we were being sarcastic or something by sending them a note but I don’t want to be rude.
Also we got a joint gift from my work friends, is there anything to prevent me from writing a thank you note to them all individually?
Thanks for any advice you can give. 0413-14
If you both circulated through the reception greeting and thanking guests for coming, there is no need to write them a note thanking them again for coming. Grateful acknowledgement of having received a wedding gift is always appropriate.
As for your co-workers, if it is a small company and you know who contributed, by all means write individual notes. You can’t lose sending personal messages of gratitude. But if it is a large number of co-workers and you really have no idea who contributed or not, I would default to writing one note to all of them and post to the employee bulletin board. If one or a few people who were the ringleaders in coordinating the gift, I would certainly send them personal notes as well.
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I am not sure what I think about not thanking people who came to the wedding in writing. As OP said, (like most couples) they did not expect gifts. But the fact is that people did give the “gift of their time”. Many of them might have had to travel too. So, why not send them a note saying that it was good to see them, and the couple is glad that they could make it. You can go and meet every person at the table, but you can’t quite tell thanks to everyone individually. (We had gone around the tables, with only 6-8 people in each. But we said thanks to everyone on the table, or to smaller groups of people we were speaking at a given time. But if we spent all the time thanking people, we’ll never be able to get any time to actually speak. And people have so much to say at weddings!).
Admin’s advice is spot on.
Better safe than sorry. I sent thank you notes to everyone who attended my wedding, including those who didn’t give a gift, because it meant a lot to me that they were willing to get up early to shlep a hundred or more miles to be there.