Perfect Bride

by admin on October 22, 2013

I am thrilled to report that I had the great honour of being her Maid of Honor 2 days ago when she married her wonderful husband. She was truly the most gracious bride I have had the pleasure to meet. She had only one attendant- me. She asked me months in advance, told me her colors (red and orange for the fall season) and encouraged me to pick any dress I loved. She also insisted I allow her to pay for the dress, hair and nails! She believes that asking someone to be in your wedding means they are doing you an honour and it shouldn’t come with huge costs. I know that most bride’s could not afford this generosity but it was greatly appreciated.

I was invited to food tastings, dress fittings and all number of events but never expected to bend to her schedule, this attitude made it a joy to accompany her to many pre-wedding appointments.

I wanted to throw her a bridal shower, but she specifically did not want an event where anyone would feel any pressure to bring gifts (they didn’t have any registries at any point) so I held an afternoon bridal tea for a small number of very close friends and family. Anyone who inquired about gifts was directed to please consider one of the couple’s favourite charities, including those that rescue animals and help families with the medical expenses of sick children. She (and her mom!) both sent out thank you notes within 1 week.

Both the bride and I share a love of cooking and baking so I was asked if I would consider helping to make the wedding cake. They didn’t want anything super fancy and favoured taste over all else. It was an honour and the couple were so thankful.

The wedding was 2 days ago. The bride (and groom) looked incredible and took the time to greet each guest (they chose to invite about 30 special people) after dinner and thank them for joining them on their special day. They even arranged with the DJ to have a play list that included the special wedding songs of each couple in attendance that had been married for a long time, as a tribute to how much their family had taught them about long and happy marriages.

The next morning I received a phone message from the bride thanking me for everything and I’m sure her thank you cards will be out within 7-10 days! 1021-13

{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }

Toreen October 22, 2013 at 8:48 am

That’s right, Let her make everyone else look evil & greedy. 😉


Allie October 22, 2013 at 11:52 am

Good one, Toreen. That bitch!
Seriously, it’s nice to see a happy wedding story for a change. Bad news is so much more heavily reported that it makes us think the world is a horrible, depraved place when in fact all sorts of wonderful things happen every day.
Congratulations to this lovely bride and her family.


another Laura October 22, 2013 at 9:46 am

They even arranged with the DJ to have a play list that included the special wedding songs of each couple in attendance that had been married for a long time, as a tribute to how much their family had taught them about long and happy marriages.
Love this! I attended a wedding where the couple had one dance for married couples, and everyone started out dancing, then the DJ began having couples sit out who had been married less than however long until the only couple left was the one married longest. Very sweet. The HC just happened to be getting married on the groom’s parents’ and grandparents’ anniversary, so I think there was a dance for just those three couples, too.


Michele K. October 22, 2013 at 9:47 am

Wow. A bride and groom that actually get it.

Instead of making it a me-me gift-grab event, it is a celebration of bringing two lives together while honoring those who are guests. Attendees made to feel special and not treated as unpaid slaves. Thanking people for their attendance and gifts. No hints about registries on the invites.

Creating a wedding they can afford to enjoy with special people in their lives instead of an over-blown affair attended by hundreds just to get more gifts from people who are close to being complete strangers.

This one belongs in the Good Wedding Hall of Fame. Is there such a thing?


Wild Irish Rose October 22, 2013 at 10:12 am

I LOVE perfect bride stories!


Ashley October 22, 2013 at 10:51 am

I’m glad things worked out for you. It sounds lovely. But would she have been “perfect” still if she had requested you buy a certain dress, you still had to host a bridal shower, and she had a bakery make her cake? Only reason I ask is because I’ve been a BM three times before and each time I purchased the required dresses and accessories and we the bridal party planned and paid for the shower.


mpk October 22, 2013 at 11:07 am

I think this is a lovely story and future brides should take note of the graciousness of this bride.
I don’t understand why brides think they have to order anyone around when friends would do things willingly just knowing it would be appreciated.
Thanks for sending this story in.


mpk October 22, 2013 at 11:08 am

and @tureen – if the shoe fits ……


Toreen October 23, 2013 at 8:50 am



Kimstu October 22, 2013 at 12:24 pm

@OP: Good for her and good for you! It is a real pleasure now and then to come across a story on this site about somebody who put her effort into being considerate of others instead of focusing only on what SHE wants because it’s HER DAY.

Mind you, I don’t think that paying for the attendant’s dress or having only a charities registry or having a very small guest list is necessarily required for a bride to earn the “Perfect” label. There are lots of very considerate and gracious brides (are there lots? I HOPE there are lots!) who don’t go that far but are nonetheless very thoughtful and appreciative to their attendants and guests.

Any bride who isn’t thoughtful and appreciative, on the other hand, SHOULD feel evil and greedy. 😉 The “Perfect Bride” Hall of Fame exists partly so those lazy or selfish brides who don’t think brides need to behave graciously are reminded how much other people like it when they do!


SororSalsa October 22, 2013 at 11:12 pm

@Kimstu, ITA. I was a BM in a friend’s wedding about 15 years ago. All of the BM’s purchased our dresses, but the bride very considerately chose a dress that was only $50. She let us wear our own shoes (black pumps) and gave us the jewelry and hair/makeup as our bridal party gift. She had a very reasonable but very lovely wedding. I consider her a perfect bride.


AIP October 22, 2013 at 4:07 pm

I want to marry her too now!


SV October 23, 2013 at 9:21 am

This is lovely! Thank you for sending it in 🙂


Mer October 23, 2013 at 10:22 am

This story is at the same time uplifting and sad. I mean, it’s clearly a story about wonderful bride, but what is sad that most of these things should be the norm, not an exception. However, it’s nice to read a positive post. Of course the negative ones get most attention and gently distorts the view to look like all brides are monsters, while there must be (I really must believe this…) thousands of brides who are like this nice woman described in the post.


Angel October 27, 2013 at 8:39 pm

I completely agree with this. Sadly, there are a lot of brides who get downright nutty about their “big day.” One of my husband’s friends, who was in our wedding party along with her hubby, made a comment that our wedding was one of the least stressful she had ever been in. She had once been in a wedding that was supposed to be held outdoors, the bride and groom had NO backup plan. I don’t think I need to tell you what happened on their wedding day. It didn’t just rain, it POURED. Buckets. My friend was dressed in a lovely bridesmaids gown and heels, all of which got soaked in the walk between the tent and back up to the mansion where the reception was held. To top it off the evening before my friend made a comment to the bride, that no matter what happens tomorrow the important thing is, you’re getting married! And you’ll still be married at the end of the day. Well the bride claims my friend “jinxed” her and didn’t speak to her all day–or anyone else for that matter. She ended up staying upstairs for most of her reception–throwing up from stress.

I’m sorry but that to me is a bridezilla. And she ruined it not only for herself, but just made everything awkward for everyone else–including the groom who ended up attending most of their reception on his own. Truthfully as a bride I probably could have slapped my friend across the face and I still would not have been as poorly behaved as this bride was lol. But acting gracious and kind ought to be the rule, and not the exception. Although the bride in the OP’s story did go above and beyond.


Marozia October 23, 2013 at 4:28 pm

A truly gracious bride! I’m glad it went well with them (and you too!).
Bless them, and hope they have a long and happy marriage.


Dora October 23, 2013 at 5:47 pm

Thank you for sharing. It’s good to hear that some are still getting it right!


Ann October 24, 2013 at 8:33 pm

What a wonderful story!

But I feel sad that a “Perfect Brides” TV show would probably never fly. Instead, a show with the biggest harpies and most ruinous weddings becomes a smash hit. I guess that’s another thread.


sylvie October 25, 2013 at 9:37 pm

Wonderful story! No bridezilla or frankengroom here. Nice to read a story about a couple that are not all about treating their families, attendants and guests like cash cows. Good job, and I hope they have many happy years together.


AS November 4, 2013 at 1:28 pm

When I first read this story, I thought “what’s the big deal? Being nice to your guests is perfectly normal”. But then I realized that we don’t acknowledge the nice stuff. It doesn’t have to be something big. Not everyone is in a situation where they can do something big. But small thoughtful things do matter. I am sure almost all of us see nice couples everyday. On this website where we see all the awful things that people do, it is refreshing to see someone celebrate a thoughtful couple.


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