Selfless Bride

by admin on May 31, 2012

During the summer of my nineteenth birthday, my uncle got married, and my family spent the week in his and my mom’s hometown helping with preparations and taking a mini-vacation. As it turned out, the date he and his bride had chosen for their wedding was the date of my nineteenth birthday. It wasn’t a big deal – it wasn’t as if it was a milestone birthday year, and I had my share of celebrations when we got back – but at first, I was slightly dismayed to have to share my birthday with his wedding.

When the big day came around, the wedding and reception were lovely, and everyone had a lot of fun. My parents had wished me a happy birthday earlier that day, and I wasn’t anticipating any further focus to be shifted onto me; with the date being what it was and the festivities underway, I didn’t want or expect to take the spotlight away from my uncle and his new wife. Imagine my surprise when, halfway through the roughly 400-person country club reception, the bride finds me, brings me out onto the dance floor, hands me a plate of wedding cake, and has the entire crowd sing “Happy Birthday” to me in the middle of her wedding reception!

As we live a good six hours away from my uncle and aren’t able to visit very often, I didn’t know the bride very well at all at this point; I didn’t even know she knew it was my birthday, much less expect her to make such a sweet, selfless gesture on what most people would call the biggest day of her life. I found it really touching that even on the one day it’s considered forgivable to play the spoiled princess and think only of yourself, this woman would interrupt her reception to make sure that I felt remembered and loved. It’s good to know that in a world where Bridezillas run rampant, there are still some truly thoughtful brides out there. 0520-12

{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }

Sharon May 31, 2012 at 9:42 am

What a lovely gesture, and a wonderful memory.

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Laura May 31, 2012 at 9:52 am

My husband and I got married on his grandpa’s birthday. We ordered a separate birthday cake, and together with our guests sang happy birthday to him. He seemed genuinely pleased and suprised. He died 2 years ago, and I’m so glad we did it. It forged a special bond between us.

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Meegs May 31, 2012 at 12:17 pm

We did the exact same thing for my father-in-law – our wedding day was his 70th b-day!

OP that is a great story, but I do have to disagree with one thought you expressed: It absolutely is not considered forgivable (by me or anyone I know) to act like a spoiled princess and think only of yourself on your wedding day, or any other day, for that matter.

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Bint May 31, 2012 at 2:13 pm

It’s a trend! At my wedding we all sang happy birthday to the best man’s sister!

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AS May 31, 2012 at 10:09 am

Thanks for sharing the story. You surely have a wonderful aunt.

I used to love the “Perfect Bride” section in the archives, and I started missing stories of wonderful, selfless couples. People like this saves the day.

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Harley Granny May 31, 2012 at 11:20 am

How sweet! Nice to hear a non-bridezilla story!
You’re uncle has a keeper there!

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jena rogers May 31, 2012 at 11:41 am

This brought tears to my eyes. You are lucky to add such a wonderful new member to your family.

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Ashley May 31, 2012 at 12:18 pm

Aww, that’s awesome!

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Stacey Frith-Smith May 31, 2012 at 12:44 pm

Aww! Soo sweet! (sniff sniff..) What a graceful gesture by a lovely new family member.

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Gee May 31, 2012 at 12:50 pm

Some faith in humanity restored!

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LovleAnjel May 31, 2012 at 1:03 pm

What a sweet story!

My brother got married on our niece’s 4th birthday, and they had the baker make a separate little bday cake for her. They brought it out right after the official cake-cutting and everyone sang.

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Miss Alex May 31, 2012 at 1:19 pm

What a nice story! Thank you for sharing this with us, OP.

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Sarah Jane May 31, 2012 at 5:36 pm

Honestly, as I was reading, I was afraid you were going to be one of those folks who complain about attention (“I was so embarrassed!” or “I don’t like a crowd looking at me!” or something like that.) I’m so glad you enjoyed a little bit of spotlight this lovely bride wanted to share with you on your birthday.

What a thoughtful aunt you have, and how wonderful of you to post this story. You both sound like sweethearts.

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Cat May 31, 2012 at 6:08 pm

I hope you cherish that lady. I would give a great deal to have a relative like that.

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AnyMouse May 31, 2012 at 7:29 pm

What a wonderful bride! I also want to give props to the OP for being so mature as to not be upset about having other obligations on her birthday or expect anything at age 19.

On my 30th birthday, I attended a family wedding. I also had a family wedding the weekend before. And then there was a friend’s wedding the weekend after.
At each of those weddings, I either had to leave before the cake was cut, or they ran out of cake before getting to my table.
I didn’t expect anyone to sing to me at the wedding in front of everyone, but I sure do wish someone had at least said happy birthday privately if I wasn’t even getting a slice of cake!

It makes me so happy to know that not all brides forget that there are other people in the universe and there are possibly many milestones other than her own wedding occurring.

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Enna June 2, 2012 at 5:52 am

OP you weren’t being a spolit or anything like that. The Bride was tactfully sharing a part of her day with your day. I’m pretty sure when your uncle got married they had to choose that day for geniune reasons so various family members could make it. Someone must have mentioned it to the bride, it could have been your uncle.

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inNM June 4, 2012 at 9:54 am

I had a friend do a similar thing at her wedding, and like the OP, I was appropriately shocked and humbled.

I was born on 09/10… so in 2011 (or 09/10/11) my friend R was to be married in her hometown of Las Vegas, NV. When we got the invitation, I had started laughing and joked that them marrying on my birthday was the best birthday gift ever!

Fast forward a couple months. They had a small but beautiful ceremony, and the boyfriend and I are sitting with some other friends we knew at the reception, finishing lunch. All of a sudden everyone at the table looks at me. I look at the boyfriend who whispers that the DJ is calling my name to stand up. I’m still confused, but it’s a small wedding reception, and they’ll find me eventually, so I stand. The bride whisks me to the center of the dance floor and then leads the reception in singing happy birthday to me. I was really touched, because I had expected to celebrate briefly as she visited tables, have a small private toast between us, and move on.

The bride is still (and has always been) a very dear friend.

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Ann June 4, 2012 at 12:51 pm

That’s lovely. That was the very definition of graciousness.

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JackManifesto June 5, 2012 at 12:23 am

Beautiful!

Reminds me of my sisters wedding two weeks ago. I had graduated college on that Wed. and she was married the following Saturday. At the reception my new BIL and sister were thanking his and our parents as well as all of the guests for coming, and then had the spot light turned to where I was sitting and told the whole group that I had just graduated! 🙂 My BIL had also graduated the weekend prior to the wedding, and did the same announcement for the two tables of med students who were celebrating his wedding with him and my sister instead of having grad parties of their own.

The icing on the cake, so to speak, was that the bestman’s graduation was the day of the wedding, and he had come rather than attend commencement! Same spot light and honoring, but they actually got him a special (his favorite) dessert to enjoy during the reception as a small token of their appreciation for being there.

I always knew they were a sweet couple, but it was so nice to see them spreading the love on their special day!!

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SciFiLeslie June 6, 2012 at 8:57 am

Although I agree with the previous posters about what a lovely gesture the bride made, I find it slightly off-putting that as an adult you were “slightly dismayed” about having to share your birthday. I could see being miffed if you were turning 10, but not 19.

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skeeter June 12, 2012 at 11:08 am

We chose to have our wedding on the same day as a good friend’s birthday. We joke that her & her husband will forever be inextricably linked to our relationship, as we first started to really get to know each other at a party for his birthday, then got married on hers. She was also a pretty instrumental force in getting us together.

At the wedding, I had some flowers prepared for her & called her forward during my speech. The whole room spontaneously broke into ‘Happy Birthday’, and for the first time (ever, I think!) I saw her get a little teary. Definitely a great memory for all of us!

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TM June 19, 2012 at 6:55 pm

@SciFiLeslie — Oh, your tsk-tsk isn’t fair. I assume she just meant that she was a little bummed out since she wanted to have a fun birthday night out with friends. Most 19 year olds would. I spent my 19th (or was it 20th?) birthday on a road trip with friends to Toronto. It was great being old enough to have a birthday adventure.

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