An Unusual Ringbearer

by admin on September 22, 2011

I posted a link to this video to my daughter’s Facebook Wall only to have her and her friends demand that it be deleted because it was just too disgusting for words.

{ 54 comments… read them below or add one }

NicoleK September 22, 2011 at 4:44 am

Cheesey, sure, tacky, sure… but disgusting?


admin September 22, 2011 at 7:05 am

It’s a nearly naked man in a loin cloth. Very inappropriate for a wedding ceremony.


Kali Ravel September 22, 2011 at 10:55 am


I can’t tell from the video if the person speaking is a bridesmaid, or the bride. Either way, she should have been informed in advance, particularly if she is the latter. However, I still don’t see why a loving couple, performing an agreed-upon shout-out to a book they both love, would be inappropriate.


Chocobo September 22, 2011 at 2:09 pm

Why is a nearly naked man in a loincloth inappropriate? Do you really have to ask?

I don’t mind personalization in a wedding, but there is a difference between personalizing and making your wedding into a piece of theater. You’re not there to put on a show, you’re there to get married, which is a very serious commitment — the ceremony, at least, should reflect that.

There are much better ways to incorporate Tolkien, or Star Trek, or your love of the Italian Renaissance artists into the wedding than stuffing people into costumes and becoming actors and set pieces.


Elizabeth II September 22, 2011 at 8:16 pm

“Serious commitment?” A wedding is more often than not a narcissistic display of the couple’s great wealth, refined taste, physical beauty, personal splendor, and the generosity in allowing the guests to attend such a prestigious event. In other words, it’s the grown-up version of that one kid we all knew who would perch on top of the playground equipment waving his or her arms for attention. Maybe weddings used to be about a serious commitment, but I think these days the solemnity is gone. It’s nothing more than dinner and a show (assuming that the reception provides a full meal).

Chocobo September 23, 2011 at 8:22 am

Yes, marriage is still a serious commitment, even when people don’t treat it’s ceremonies as such.

Kali Ravel September 23, 2011 at 9:32 am

He’s not showing any more skin than you’d see at a swimming pool. The ceremony was held outside, and not in a church, which would be somewhat disrespectful.

A wedding is about the two people getting married. While they should, of course, strive to ensure that their guests are not uncomfortable, I see no reason to insist that they “take it seriously” in the way that *you* deem appropriate.

A wedding should be whatever the two people in love want it to be, regarding the above proviso about avoiding unreasonable discomfort amongst their guests for whatever reason. Why should the day on which they publicly commit to one another be completely removed from the rest of their lives?

ellesee September 22, 2011 at 2:36 pm

The bride is a brunette. They were interviewing the 2 ladies in the seats.


Enna October 2, 2011 at 3:23 pm

I thought it was a bit strange – people have different opoinions on what is appropriate but then if we couldn’t comment about some weddings there would be no point in this site. I didn’t find it funny, but I don’t find it in-appropriate either, just strange, but not in a bad way. What would be in-appropriate would be an offensive best man speech or that grandmother making an annoucnement and leaving.

Kendra September 22, 2011 at 11:49 am

Well, at least they put it in a bow-tie?


NicoleK September 23, 2011 at 11:05 am

Agreed… tacky, inappropriate, goofy, absurd certainly. But so disgusting that they recoil in horror and are too shocked to have a link on FB?


Michelle McCammon September 26, 2011 at 2:21 pm

I was married on the beach in a swimsuit with a thigh-length sarong-type wrap, my husband in board shorts – glad to know we were inappropriate. The Gollum had flesh colored pants to his knees in addition to the loincloth.

I agree with the commenter below – Kali who stated: “I see no reason to insist that they “take it seriously” in the way that *you* deem appropriate.”

Our minister could and would have indicated that he felt our attire was inappropriate to the ceremony; the close friends and family who attended could and would have indicated their concerns regarding appropriateness throughout the planning process.


lkb September 22, 2011 at 5:06 am

Wow! I’m a fan of the movies and the books but….

There’s something to be said for solemnity.

I think this would only work if the vast majority of attendees were really, really, really big Tolkein fans.

(I’m also not a fan of four weddings — to have people competing to see whose wedding is the best and to critique the personal choices of the HC just seems sooooo tacky.)


admin September 22, 2011 at 7:03 am

My daughter is a huge Tolkien fan but even she found the idea of a Gollum ringbearer more than she could bear.


Jamesy October 16, 2011 at 3:23 pm

I thought it was funny. In theory, it’s hilarious. In practice…not so much.


Anika September 22, 2011 at 6:23 am

Oh, my goodness, that’s AMAZING! Haha, my girlfriend and I would LOVE to have something like that at our wedding. Sad that none of the charming ladies seem to get the joke.


Jordan September 22, 2011 at 6:24 am

Okay, yeah — COMPLETELY inappropriate for a wedding.

But I’m a big Lord of the Rings fan, so I would have found it hilarious!


Sarah W. September 22, 2011 at 8:19 am

Aw, come on, that was hilarious. Clearly the bride and groom were enjoying it, it was just the other girls who didn’t understand. The concept of that show is that four brides go to each others’ weddings and compete for whose wedding is the best, so these girls are supposed to be judging each other harshly for a cash prize. If the couple and the people who were at the wedding as real guests understood and thought it was cool, what’s the harm?


Powers September 23, 2011 at 8:28 am

Well, for one thing, it’s not a good way to win “Four Weddings”.


Age September 22, 2011 at 9:18 am

Hillarious. But is this an actual wedding or a gag? Honestly, what do you expect from reality TV? lol.


LovleAnjel September 22, 2011 at 10:07 am

It’s one of those things that, to the fans, sounds good in theory, but in practice just turns out all wrong.

One of my friends had a fantasy-themed wedding (the MC was Puss-in-Boots), and some of the groom’s friends broke into a (seemingly choreographed) sword fight during the toasts. It was very awkward.


Journeywoman September 22, 2011 at 11:14 am

My husband is only sorry he didn’t think of it. He wanted to engrave our wedding rings in elvish.

I’m not sorry he didn’t think of it.

I agree that it is not disgusting–tacky–oh yes my precious.


Yvaine September 22, 2011 at 11:35 am

I know a couple who had a small boy dressed as Frodo as the ringbearer. Now that was a cute shout-out to Tolkien. Kid in hobbit clothes=adorable. Grown man in loincloth=not so much.


Rei November 7, 2011 at 8:29 am

I had the very same thought!


The Elf September 22, 2011 at 11:47 am

What? Everyone knows that Frodo is the ringbearer. Sheesh.


Just Laura September 22, 2011 at 12:20 pm

Best comment.


TheVapors September 22, 2011 at 11:42 pm

I first laughed when I saw the video. Funny that they did it. And funnier that those other women didn’t know what it was. Then I laughed at your comment. Lovely. =)


Rei November 7, 2011 at 8:30 am

I agree and I find it perfect that the post above yours mentions someone who had the ringbearer dressed as Frodo! 😀


Kendra September 22, 2011 at 11:55 am

Well, I tried……I really, really tried. I started it twice, but it was just too…..Ewwwww!!! I’ve never heard of this show, but, to be honest, the only “reality” telivision I watch is nature documentaries and sometimes the local news. I get putting in personal touches in weddings, but this was so over the top, as a guest, I would have probably been horrified.


Leslie Holman-Anderson September 22, 2011 at 12:22 pm

I must say, the fellow did a good Gollum! But no — an extended gag like that just doesn’t work in a wedding. Fail.


Beccah September 22, 2011 at 12:37 pm

I agree with Sarah W.
The people complaining about it on the tape are the women who are supposed to rate the wedding against the others in hopes that THEY are judged as having the best wedding.
You see & hear of people doing all kinds of crazy/odd/unique things for their weddings – getting married in the nude, getting married underwater, theme weddings, you name it. Isn’t a wedding something that is for the couple getting married? So what if it’s something YOU would never do – it’s not your wedding.
One person’s view of inappropriate is another’s idea of originality. (BTW it looks like he had something on under the loin cloth)


Amber September 26, 2011 at 1:05 pm

I’d give one caveat to people marrying in the nude — if the HC are dedicated nudists, and believe that nudity is natural. If it’s their way of life to go about nude, not as titillation or a statement but as a mantra — then I’m all for nude weddings.

A couple trying to one-up others in wedding originality, not so much.

Also, as per the clip — anyone else see Confetti? That movie was essentially the satire that became this reality show. Boy, did the Brits guess right on what was coming.


Kat September 22, 2011 at 12:47 pm

Okay, perhaps I’m too much of a geek (several of my friends have had swordfights at their weddings, another set had R2D2 as their ringbearer) but this seems moderately tacky but nothing like the horror that the Other Bride seems to have experienced.


Chocobo September 22, 2011 at 2:01 pm

Haha, okay, I laughed. I wouldn’t call it “disgusting”, per say, but in poor taste? Definitely. I would have been perturbed through my giggles had I been there. Not appropriate for a wedding ceremony. I don’t really have a problem with the incorporation of Tolkien, should the newlyweds be big fans, but some elegant subtlety is in much better taste.


ellesee September 22, 2011 at 2:43 pm

The bride and groom are both in on it (obviously)…


Kali Ravel September 23, 2011 at 9:37 am

Awww…look how happy they are!^_^

Although, I do have to wonder why, at that opening. Why would anyone have someone else judge their wedding on TV?


Elizabeth II September 22, 2011 at 2:45 pm

I disagree!

I love love LOVED this video. That Gollum impression was amazing, and his makeup and wardrobe were very well done. I’m a huge fan of both the books and films, but I would like to think if I was not that I would still get a smile out of this.

Here’s the thing: a wedding is a very important event for a couple, and it’s something that they should be able to remember and enjoy on a personal level. These people came together to officiate their union, and they should be permitted to do that in whatever manner they please. Yeah, a partially clad man is rather unusual, but it’s not like he was showing more than one would see at the beach or pool, especially since he seemed to be wearing flesh-colored spandex under the cloth. If you want to talk about the tackiness of what should be a solemn occasion, why don’t you mention the women who doll themselves up like the whore of Babylon before approaching the altar?

I’ll bet if something like that happened at my wedding (which is possible, as my boyfriend is also a Tolkien fan), my guests would heartily approve. Then again, I’m friends with a bunch of fellow nerds ^_^


Kali Ravel September 23, 2011 at 9:49 am

Someone posted the full video above;

At the end, the bride says that she “couldn’t have asked for a better day”.

They’re clearly in love, they had the wedding of their dreams for a relatively low budget, as far as we can see, they weren’t gimme pigs, and their guests seemed to have a lovely day (apart from the three ladies who stood to gain a honeymoon in Tahiti if they picked at all the flaws). Good for them.


Baglady September 22, 2011 at 9:13 pm

But wait: Wasn’t Gollum corrupted, perverted and basically turned into a pathetic mess by the ring? Is that the symbolism you really want for your WEDDING ring?


Mechtilde September 24, 2011 at 9:40 am

That’s pretty much what I was thinking.


Cat September 22, 2011 at 10:08 pm

The things you see when you forgot to bring your gun!


RenaissanceGrrl September 22, 2011 at 11:24 pm

Count me in as finding this awesome. The wall to my right covered floor-to-ceiling in Lord of the Rings posters suggest I may be a bit biased, though.

But I think levity has its place in any wedding–it’s a solemn commitment, but it needn’t be dour like a funeral, it’s still supposed to be a happy occasion!


penguintummy September 23, 2011 at 3:10 am

This is just so out of place and weird! The rest of the wedding doesn’t appear to be Lord of the Rings themed, so why gollum? just doesn’t seem to fit. Although this TV show is so nauseating anyway I am not really suprised.


Wren September 23, 2011 at 9:18 am

Isn’t a wedding ceremony with all its implications of life-long commitment supposed to be taken seriously? Leave the silly stuff like this for the reception.


Clair Seulement September 23, 2011 at 2:35 pm

Once you’ve agreed to sell your wedding out to a snarky, catty “reality” show, the nude science fiction creature is one stop further on that train of thought


Alex September 24, 2011 at 11:37 pm

So very creepy.


Jodie September 26, 2011 at 10:31 pm

I love it, i’m a massive fan of LOTR and this would be the caketopper of my day x


Elle September 28, 2011 at 2:40 pm

Here’s the thing: when goofballs marry each other, they bring goofy elements into their wedding. When geeks get married they bring geeky elements into their wedding. When very serious solemn people get married their weddings are very serious and solemn. Believe me, it is entirely possible to have a laugh and still take a wedding and the subsequent marriage seriously.

If you get into the “why the hell would you do sometheing that tasteless/ tacky” you’re opening up a whole argument of personal value judgements. Personally I find the white dress thing to be tasteless and tacky. (Easily spending thousands so your white dress will be different than someone else’s white dress. Only wearing it once. The waste and consumerism in the name of “what’s expected” is very bizarre to me.) But obviously for millions of people the white dress means something deep enough and personal enough that they make it a huge part of their wedding. Then they will spend hundreds on makeup, nails, and hair. How is this fashion show princess less of an insult than gollum having fun with the rings? Because she’s prettier? Because it’s traditional? Because no one is laughing? Both are statements of what the couple wants to incorporate on their day. Beautiful images are just as valid as a laugh.


Elizabeth II September 28, 2011 at 5:31 pm

I could not agree more. Weddings are less about the subsequent marriage these days, and more about the “Look at me!” aspect. Just look at the standard cultural expectations of weddings: Engagement ring? HAS to have a big diamond, better if it has a bunch of other, smaller diamonds surrounding the center stone or set in the band. I have heard from a number of sources that the ring must cost at least ten percent of the man’s yearly income. Wedding dress? It is considered tacky to buy one from, say, David’s Bridal, even if a custom made gown is far beyond your financial capability. The idea that someone else has worn THAT style dress for their wedding is a scandal (and I’m not talking about the bride’s mentality here, the guests would find it appalling as well, at least in my area). The hair and makeup? You NEED a manicure and pedicure, even if no one sees your feet, you NEED a sparkling tiara, and that jewelry had BETTER have real diamonds or you’re just fake. “Wait, what? I’m going to be spending my life with my husband after this day? Whatever, the love can wait until AFTER I’ve sated my narcissism and need to fit in.”

Part of this is society imposing idiotic expectations on women (like that should be a surprise, says the bottom-heavy girl), and part of it are the egos of all those women who care enough about what other people think (who aren’t exactly good friends if they will assume such awful things) that they try to live up to the expectations no matter the cost. It’s a mess, but it’s a fascinating anthropological mess. Perhaps I shall research this insanity further.


Lisa September 28, 2011 at 11:20 pm

I’m more upset that one of the other tacky brides was wearing white. Pretty sure you’re still being a jerk wearing a white dress to a wedding.


SouthernSugar September 29, 2011 at 4:31 pm

Doesn’t seem any more or less disgusting than getting married while drunk in Vegas and getting it annulled hours alter.


cheyne October 1, 2011 at 2:22 pm

I thought I was the only one who noticed the “other bride” in the white dress. All I’d have to say to her is “pot meet kettle”.


Mabel October 5, 2011 at 11:20 pm

Clearly these people are not nerds. As a huge Lord of the Rings geek, I would have loved it. Gollum? Ringbearer? TOTALLY. In fact, if I ever have a LOTR-themed wedding, I’m stealing this idea!


Nissa March 8, 2012 at 9:51 am

Okay…Let me preface this statement by saying that I LOVE The Lord of the Rings. This trilogy is my favorite books. I reread them, along with The Hobbit, once a year.

Having said all that, there is NO WAY Gollum will be making an appearance at my wedding!


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