I wanted to share a story about two weddings I recently attended that were somewhat spoiled because during the speeches someone decided to raise issues with the bride or groom’s choice of spouse:
Wedding #1 – The groom, let’s call him “Luke” had previously dated “Holly” a couple of years before he got together with the bride, Holly’s sister “Serena.” There is no jealousy between Holly and Serena over this, and Holly is happy for the couple. Holly has always had more than her fair share of male attention, whereas Serena spent many years as a carer for their disabled mother, and had very little time for relationships before she met Luke. That’s why it was completely uncalled for when the father of the bride said in his speech (I’m paraphrasing, but this was the essence of it):
“I’m glad Luke chose Serena in the end, because I don’t think she would ever have had another suitor. Holly will just have to find someone else.”
Wedding #2 – I attended the wedding of my cousin “Jack” and his girlfriend “Amy.” The best man, “Mike” was an old friend of Jack (I use the term “friend” very loosely.) His speech began with the usual jokes and anecdotes, but then he went on to say that he had always expected Jack to get together with “Lisa” (another long-time friend of theirs) because Jack had known her for much longer than he’s known Amy, and Lisa had always been there for him. Mike ended this little diatribe with, “But if Jack changes his mind, at least he knows where Lisa is.” The bride and groom were angry about this, as were several other people – including Lisa, who is very close to Amy.
I was always under the impression that a wedding was supposed to be the happiest day of a couple’s life together, and not the time to bring up the subject of people they used to date or could have dated. If nothing else, isn’t it just a little too late by that time? 0827-11
Pay attention fathers and best men! Toasts and speeches are not the time to bring up old flames.